ACCEPTANCE
According to the "Merriam Webster Dictionary" to accept means "to receive willingly; to agree to; to assume the obligation to pay." Therefore, acceptance is the "act of accepting; the state of being accepted or acceptable."
"And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today." That is a quote from the book "Alcoholics Anonymous", page 417.
Now, I don't know about you, I do not "receive willingly" or "agree to" having problems in my life today. In fact, I don't think problems are acceptable for a healthy lifestyle. Problems just...well...are not acceptable!
Realistically, sometimes, I have problems. For instance, have you ever ran out of gas when you are on your way to an important meeting? I have. What was the first thing you did? Be honest. I started using some flowery words. Then I yelled...at the stupid car. Then I blamed somebody else for not putting gas in the car after they used it. As the other cars were zooming past me, I started yelling at those cars for going so fast. In the mean time, my blood pressure is raising, I am angry and can not think of what I need to do first.
Wow! Did I ever waste a lot of energy and put myself in danger. I am just glad I had no one else with me at the time. I could have caused an accident.
That was a long time ago. Now, what if, I could just "accepted" the fact that I was out of gas. I could have made a phone call to AAA or a friend and called to let the meeting know of my "situation". I could have been calmer, not using such flowery words, yelling like a crazy woman, not blaming someone else and my blood pressure would not have gone up. I could have avoided being angry and known exactly what to do. Sound simple?
I was on vacation in the Bahamas taking a bus tour of the caves and exploring other interesting sites. There was a cute local girl that was our guide. She was explaining different customs and ideas of the islands. At one point she said, "and if you sould get separated from the group, no problem mon, just a situation." What a wonderful attitude.
Acceptance is something that takes practice. First of all learning to not react can be difficult, yet it can be done. It's like remembering to turn the light switch off after exiting a room. Takes some time. Eventually it is something you do without even thinking about it.I have learned that "acceptance" does not mean "approval". When I can fully accept the fact that my behavior may not be acceptable, or that I have a "situation", then I have an opportunity to do something about it. If it can't be fixed, maybe it is just that my attitude needs to be changed. "No problem, mon, just a situation!"